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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23173969">What He Remembers</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/birdisthewordistheword/pseuds/birdisthewordistheword'>birdisthewordistheword</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>BoJack Horseman</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canonical Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Short One Shot, Suicide</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 14:41:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>229</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23173969</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/birdisthewordistheword/pseuds/birdisthewordistheword</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A certain red horse remembers just why exactly he's where he is.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>What He Remembers</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was just a short thing I wrote up. I've noticed that there isn't an my fanfics about Secretariat, so I decided to try my hand at writing one.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first thing that comes to mind is the view.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It's a nice day. Clear skies, warm sun, calm waters.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His mind momentary flickers to… other things.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But the water draws him back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It comforts him, knowing that at the very least, he gets a nice view on the way down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He can see the water clearly, pale blue, sun glinting off of small waves, lapping at the shores of the river.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His mind flickers again. He remembers the morning paper, the headline burned fresh in his mind.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"SECRETARIAT BANNED FROM RACING FOR LIFE"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He remembers the letter that ended his career, sitting on a mail pile. It took a couple days before he could muster enough courage to open it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He remembers the Other Letter he received, when he was still the posterboy of Thoroughbred Racing. How it told him that "due to the nature of your brother's death, we are unfortunately unable to retrieve his remains at this time."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He hasn't stopped remembering when the solder had shown up at his doorstep, apologized for his loss and told him about how his brother "died a hero." He knows that no amount of apologizing is ever going to change the fact that his brother is dead and that <em>he's to blame</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His mind comes back to the present.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath,</p>
<p>and jumps.</p>
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